Es que no quiero salir

A month and a week. That is all that remains of my time here in Granada. And I am very sad about it. I know, less than two months ago I was complaining about life here and how much I miss home, but now I truly feel like I have made a connection with the city and the country and the prospect of returning home to the same routine and real life is daunting. Plus I know that change in constant and what I will be coming back to will be different, as will I.

My friend Olivia came to visit me here this last week and playing tourist with her just made my appreciation of Granada grow. And it made me realize just how amazing my host family and my friends and even the city itself are. We spent some time in the Mediterranean town of Málaga which was fun but returning home to show Olivia the sites was a wake-up call. I got to see the city through a newcomer´s eyes again and I also got to return to some of my favorite places. We spent a lot of time at various bars or cafés, just people watching and talking, or wandering the streets and stumbling upon tiny plazas and local markets. I am almost regretting my decision to go to Bacelona for a weekend because that is a weekend I am not in Granada. And as far as my Morocco trip goes, I am still debating when I could possibly tear myself away from here.

It was at this point that I realized I can´t imagine leaving Spanish life behind. First of all I had two exams this week and for once, I didn´t spend hours studying and I didn´t stress about them as I would have at home. Instead, I did what I felt like doing, which including going out for tapas or churros with my friends because time is getting too short here. Okay so maybe my grades won´t turn out that well but I have much fonder memories now than I would have had I sat around poring over my notes. I say "yes" here so much more than I do back home and every single day is an adventure. Plus when you are abroad, so much of your mentality is about meeting new people and trying new things and I hate to say it, but getting back into that Willamette bubble just takes that away from you. I have seriously contemplated staying here for the full year but you and I both know I can´t... not only do I think my parents would shoot me dead but I guess I can´t avoid real life forever, and graduation requirements and jobs and internships and the future are still staring me in the face.

So I know this post may have turned into a stream-of-consciousness ramble but I feel better for having put it all out there, especially given some of my previous posts. Where I used to tear up thinking about all I am missing out on back home, I get misty-eyed thinking of all I will be leaving behind. I guess this just means I will have to make the most of my time left here but I am sure that no matter what, there will always be that feeling that there is so much more I could be doing. Any way I need to stop now. Thanks for listening.